Tuesday, March 31, 2009

All aboard, Get on the A train


photo by thirdrail


One of the things I have been missing since my move to Israel is the subway. Living in New York, I really took its efficiency for granted. Over the past couple of days I have been getting out, going to some events, networking; but getting to and from these places by public transportation was a nightmare. Even intercity buses are lacking. I bailed on one event in Tel Aviv this morning partly because the traveling gave me nightmares. (Also, going to so many events in as many days is exhausting, getting there is just half the battle!)
But while I am on the subject of what I find lacking in public transportation in Israel, let me give people a few rules in some behavior.

-When forming a queue to board a bus, it is normal practice to remain in said queue until actually seated on the bus. What is with the pushing and shoving? And 18 year old soldiers, I have all the respect for you, you know, serving the country and all, but you're young and strong, give the almost middle-aged woman with fibromyalgia a break, and let her get on the bus. And if you see there are no seats, and she is shlepping a bunch of bags, be a dear and give the poor lady a seat.

-Also, what's with the getting off in the front of the bus? Unless you are over 70 and have a cane, repeat this mantra: "On in the front, off in the back. On in the front, off in the back. On in the front, off in the back."

-When on an escalator, please do not stand so your body takes up the entire stair. Please stand to the right and allow those with patience issues to walk past you. If you are with a buddy, you don't need to be standing on the same step. This also applies to sidewalks. What's with people walking 4 abreast at snails' pace?

-When waiting for an elevator, it is customary to allow those passengers already on to exit before entering. I cannot tell you how many near head-on collisions I have almost had while trying to get off an elevator. Back to my beloved subway, to quote any conductor "LET 'EM OFF FIRST! LET 'EM OFF! LET 'EM OFF!"

Those are just a few of my rules I would like to see implemented. Please feel free to distribute, add your own, and I'll keep you posted with new ones as my misanthropic self gets annoyed by stupid people.

3 comments:

  1. A little commuter rage going on here, haha. Its been a long time since I've taken public transportation but I don't imagine for a minute that I would enjoy it. Of course driving everywhere, you put up with idiot drivers! Cell phoning while driving is insane. I have blue-tooth so if I get a call, it comes thru my radio, no hands needed, but I still pull over to talk - its too distracting.

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  2. if i had been driving, i probably would have found something else to complain about!

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  3. I'm suddenly reminded of this time I got on the bus in Jerusalem a few years ago. As anyone who has been on a bus in Israel knows, the bus driver almost always leaves the stop immediately as the last new rider is ascending the steps. This means that he has to take your money as he is driving. Well, this one time the driver was flooring it, switching lanes, and the last new passenger was practically shoving her money in his face. The driver calmly told the lady, "Rega, geveret, rega. Yesh li rak shnei yadaim ve'shalosh raglaim." I almost busted a gut!

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